Exodus chapter 10
Have you ever apologized for something when you knew inside that you weren't really sorry for what you did?
If you just said no to that question, go back and think about it a bit more. :-)
Pharaoh comes to Moses and seeks to confess his sinfulness. He wants a reprieve from God's plagues. But, his confession is more of a bargaining tool than a demonstration of sincere contrition. Confession is meant to be from a state of contrition, an honest feeling of remorse and guilt for a sin or a short-coming. A contrite person desires to correct his behaviors, "turn from his sinful ways". Without contrition our confessions are meaningless. Pharaoh makes no effort to change his ways, or to demonstrate any kind of true remorse. If so, he would have come to Moses and said something like this. "You're people can go, I am so sorry for the treatment you've received here in Egypt under my reign. I need to learn to use power without oppressing others." No, he just begs for Moses to ask God to make the plague stop. There are consequences to our sinful actions. Trying to bargain with God through false apologies does not work to remove even a moment of the suffering we cause ourselves. God knows what's in our hearts, and if we're honest, so do we.
We've all seen children, when learning to apologize, say their sorry merely because their parents forced to do so. Then, they often go right back to the same behavior. They confessed, but they weren't contrite about it. Furthermore, the very act of the apology becomes a means by which the child can continue to get his way. Early on, we learn the art of using an apology as a form of bargaining or compromising. As we get older, particularly in our teens, the act of apologizing as a tool for bargaining becomes a perfected craft. We've all seen the teenager apology with grand dramas of remorse; making promise after promise to never do it again...IF mom or dad let her have or do this one thing that she wants. As adults we're supposed to know better, but if we're honest with ourselves we all must confess that we've been rewarded for this little trick far too many times to ever let go of this tool in our bargaining/compromising tool belt.
Today is Good Friday. On this day, through the church, we are called upon to confess our sins. Granted, we are called to do this every day. But, Good Friday is a gift to us in that it is the one day when we are called upon to dig a little deeper, try to be a bit more honest with ourselves and God. The truth is, the ugliness and the sinfulness of the cross is all inside of each of us. It is only by the grace of God that it doesn't come out and destroy us. On this day, we can intentionally approach the cross, and boldly confess the truth. At Living God Church, we are given the opportunity to to physically do this very thing, by writing your sins down on a piece of paper and then literally nailing them into the cross. Each painful thrust of the hammer against the nail is a solemn reminder that Jesus is still willing to accept our piercing agony with the hope that we will leave our destructive sinful ways with him, and strive to sin no more. Today, on this solemn day, confess your sins with a state of contrition, not as a form of bargaining with yourself or God, but with a sincere desire to change and begin a new life, one without those sinful ways.
The first verse of a well known Good Friday hymn, which we will sing tonight is appropriate for this devotion.
"Ah, holy Jesus, how hast thou offended that we to judge thee have in hate pretended?"
Ah, Holy Jesus, how can I thank you? You died so that I may live. Today, I offer my confession. I look upon your suffering, your shame, your agony, your dying, and I know that I am the one who should be up there on the cross....not you. But, you take this, my pain, my shame, my agony, and you put it to death with your dying, and you do this for me. Let my confession be sincere, no more bargaining for my own agenda, let me desire nothing more than to turn from my ways and live as you call me to live....as you call me to live......Lord.....I want to live! Amen
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